Men often conceptualize problems with the penis as essentially hydraulic in nature; yet a complex network of emotional, neurological, muscular and endocrine functions are associated with satisfying erections and ejaculation. The practices of mental focus and physical attunement to your partner are surprisingly powerful skills that will serve you for a lifetime over the course of your sexual development.
Problems with erection were once referred to as “impotence,” Latin for without power. Certainly a man is still fully capable of pleasing a partner sexually even without an erection, yet it is understandable that men want to achieve and enjoy erections at will. Fortunately the term impotent has become obsolete, perhaps as a result of the marketing of Viagra, which popularized the more neutral language of erectile dysfunction, ED.
While it seems like Viagra should solve any erection-related problems, its use carries medical risks and may present complicated relationship dynamics. The majority of men who obtain prescriptions for Viagra do not refill them.
Another frustration many men experience involves rapid ejaculation (formerly referred to as premature ejaculation). Both ED and RE have varying causes, but anxiety and unhelpful thoughts often play a part in these phenomena. Delayed ejaculation or inability to ejaculate can also interfere with fully satisfying sexual experience. Of course there may be physical factors involved, but psychological attitudes and histories are always worth considering when working with these conditions. Because these kinds of concerns have troubled people throughout time, there are some reliable and sensible approaches that can be helpful for many couples.
I’d be glad to speak with you or send you some resources if you’d like more information on my approach. Or you can read Why Guys Hate the Idea of Therapy.
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